Love & Angst

Ewan and Natalie have been friends since they were both 19 months old. Near the beginning, Shannon would always tell me that Natalie asked after Ewan constantly. She "talked" to him on the phone, asked after him minute by minute, and in the middle of any given day or hour, totally unrelated to the situation at hand, Natalie would say, "I love Ewan." It got to the point that it was even frustrating for Shannon and Keith. Shannon asked if Ewan ever asked about Natalie, and he never did. We joked that it was so typical, the woman pining after the man, while the man remains oblivious and inattentive.

Now that they are older, and in their "testing boundaries" phase, there are often skirmishes and disagreements, and at times it would certainly seem that the "honeymoon" is over. But today convinced me that under the surface, there are strong feelings indeed, feelings that would rival any teen angst soap opera.

On our way over to their house this morning, I gave Ewan the little talk, "We are going to play with your friend. Be kind and share, and don't tattle."

Ewan replied, "But, Mommy, sometimes Natalie doesn't like me." I explained as best I could that little children have days where they don't always like to play, or that sometimes they don't want to be nice to someone that is their friend. I told him he should just be kind to Natalie, and if she doesn't want to play, to find something else to do until she decides to play again. I then said, "Sometimes you like Natalie, and sometimes you don't, right?" He thought about it for a second and then said, "Mommy, I just like Natalie every way."

I thought that was so sweet, and was feeling bad for him in case Natalie, indeed, was falling "out of love." But my fears were calmed when Natalie, sitting somewhat sullenly in a chair, looked over at Ewan and said, "Ewan, who is your best friend, me or Bella?" It was the ultimate ultimatum, and so I see that all is well in paradise.

Ewan & Natalie, May 2006